“Very demure” – the meaning, the meme, and the trend

The phrase “very demure” is often featured these days in tiktok videos and instagram memes. But the phrase isn’t being used in the way it used to be.

In this article we’re going to cover what the phrase used to meme, why the phrase suddenly started trending so much in the year 2024, and who is responsible for bringing the phrase to the fore once more. Then we’ll delve into how the usage of the phrase has changed over years from its original meaning to the various ways the saying “very demure” might be interpreted now.

What does the slang “very demure” mean?

Technically, the word “demure” dates back as far as the 1600s. However, it didn’t come into frequent use until the 1800s, when it was used to refer to young women who were “modest and reserved”. Or in other words, having a well-crafted look that epitomises grace and doesn’t scream for attention.

But, in the year 2024, a Tiktok video went so viral using the phrase “very demure”, the meme became quite a trend. With dyed swooping long hair, false eyelashes, false nails, trendy eyebrows, blusher and more, Jools Lebron tells her audience how to be demure, modest, and respectful in the workplace. In addition to the video becoming viral, so did the in-joke. Read on to find out more.

What are the origins of the trending saying “very demure”?

On the second of August, 2024, a previously little known trans woman suddenly became what the whole world was talking about, thanks to a 38 second clip where Lebron, an established beauty influencer and makeup promoter, is sitting in a car talking to the camera about the art of being demure and respectful at work while looking presentable and professional, and presenting a composed and respectful image in order to achieve a natural, demure and mindful presence in the workplace.

Lebron uses phrases such as:

• “See how I come to work? Very demure.”
• “You see how I do my makeup for work? Very demure, very mindful.”

She also discusses how little cleavage is viewable in her work outfit, and how some women turn up for work looking like the cartoon characters Marge Simpson, Patty and Selma. Obviously the script was intended to have a comedic effect against the backdrop of an influencer who has paid a great deal of attention to her physical appearance.

The video was an instant hit on Tiktok, and within less than a week, the video footage had seen over 7 million plays and over 800,000 likes. And before the end of the same month, Lebron’s audience had reached to around two million subscribed followers.

The fame and notoriety didn’t stop there. The people started extracting the audio from this audio, and using it as an overlay to their own Tiktok videos they were making. Or sometimes they didn’t even bother with the exact audio and simply used just the words, spoken or as captions, or lip dubbing them. In some cases the audio was converted into a little remix. But that’s not all. Celebrities such as Jennifer Lopez, RuPaul, Joe Jonas, Olivia Rodrigo, and Penn Badgley also made their own social media videos using the audio bits from Lebron’s original videos, including one in which Jennifer Lopez was live on stage at one of her concerts. Lebron has also appeared on Jimmy Kimmel Live!

Who is behind the “very demure” meme?

As mentioned earlier, the trending phrase “very demure” originated from Jools Lebron. Jools is very open about being a trans woman of Puerto Rican heritage. Her pronouns are “she” and “her”. By her own admission, she loves to look glamorous and she admits that she was deliberately mocking both herself and other influencer trends in general when she made her viral video.

She once stated that watching online content made by transgender social media influencers such as La demi, Nikita Dragun, and Gigi Gorgeous, helped her to feel more comfortable about her own coming out.

Off the back of that viral video in 2024, she was sufficiently financially successful from her tiktok videos that she was able to quit her job on a checkout and even pay for her gender transition with the money.

Interpretations of the phrase “very demure” and the meme

Following the original meme going viral, this sparked many other people making their own video memes on Tiktok and other platforms, where they either used the audio from the original or simply used the same words. However, people did so with different intentions…

For the most part, people were generally using the phrase ironically, mocking the trend by subtly joking about how to be demure while being totally extravagant. However, interpretations of the meme were split. For instance, Tiktoker Sabrina Thulander said she’s “always interpreted demure as a negative thing, like how a Victorian era man wants his wife to act.” While the social media strategist, Isa Lavahun, said the catchphrase is the “embodiment of subtle self-love – knowing that as long as you carry yourself with grace and empathy, no other opinion matters”.

Facts about the phrase “very demure”

Legal documents show that Jefferson Bates filed for the trademark of the phrase “very demure, very mindful” the same month that the video went viral, with the intention to use it for marketing, promotion, and advertising. In fact, there have been several other separate incidents where individuals unrelated to Lebron attempted to file trademarks related to the word “demure”. But, to date, Lebron has only filed for two herself.

Final word

So, to sum up, despite the phrase “very demure” going so utterly viral in the year 2024, and becoming quite distorted in how it is used, the meaning of the phrase “demure” hasn’t really changed as such. It still refers to females having a modest look, even though it is also now being used to refer to being understated in general or even when it’s being used to be sarcastic, saying that you’re being demure when you’re actually being all-out glamorous.